Just like Job! - wk 7

Have you ever felt like Job?  Well, I certainly have this week!  On Sunday, I woke up (not with boils), but with this terrible rash, starting on my lower abdomen and then my upper body and spreading down my legs, up my neck, head, and arms. . . And oh was it itchy!  I thought back to what I had done recently. Maybe I had some allergic reaction to something I ate. Then I wondered if this was some sign of an infection. The oncology staff had cautioned me to watch out for a fever as a sign of infection, but didn't say anything about a rash.  I called my on-call oncology doctor and he told me to take Benadryl and Claritin  for the itching.

Sunday afternoon, I had an appointment for a neupogen shot at the infusion center, so the nurses were able to take a look at my rash.  It was awful! --red and welt-like . . . and oh so itchy! After consulting with the doctor again, the nurses were able to call in a prescription for some kind of cream to help with the itching, but I still had unanswered questions! What caused this?  Will it keep spreading?  And will the itching ever end???

Well, as it turns out, I had an appointment scheduled with my GP on Monday as a follow up for my blood pressure meds.  When I mentioned that to the nurses, that was a clue!  It was probably the new blood pressure medicine.  They told me to stop taking the medicine and continue taking Benadryl and Claritin.

At my appointment Monday, my doctor agreed it was the blood pressure meds and I got some kind of shot for the itching.   I feel better now although I still have minor itching and scratching episodes. And thus, my Job reference - as I'm sure he had his share of itching and scratching.

I know, my troubles in life aren't nearly as bad as Jobs and maybe I shouldn't be comparing myself to him, but I did find that Job and I have something very much in common.  (Job 1:20) At this Job got up, tore his robe and SHAVED HIS HEAD!

But really, Job is a wonderful example of living through difficult times. He didn't, "Curse God and die," as his wife suggested.  He stayed true to God and the Bible says,  The LORD blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first (Job 42:12).

You know what?  That's my promise!  I'm claiming that!  No I didn't lose my sheep or my servants, my sons or my camels, but I have lost a few things!  And I'm gonna believe God will bless me! . . . as long as I stay faithful to him!

July 20, Sat
Still feel good.

July 21, Sun
Feel OK.

July 22, Mon
Not feeling so great.  Slept a lot.

July 23, Tues
Feeling better today.

July 24, Wed
Feeling good.

July 25, Thurs
Blood work.  If my neutrophils are low, I have to get shots again.

July 26, Friday
Neupogen shot.  Yes, I have to get them again, 3 times.

July 27, Saturday
Got my shot at 8 am, then went to Santa Cruz with my boys to celebrate my nephew's marriage. Congratulations to Jared and Ashley!

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Third Chemo Session - wk 6

Romans 12:12

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

July 13- July 19  Not much to report.

July 13, Saturday
Nice weekend!

July 14, Sunday
Josh and I worked the cameras at church.  Matt took Scott to the airport this afternoon.

July 15, Monday
Coffee with my friend, Keely.

July 16, Tuesday
Lorri G. came for a visit.  Went to Breast Cancer support group at the hospital.

July 17, Wed
Josh had doc appointment and then we clothes shopped for him.

July 18, Thurs
Coffee with my lovely pastor's wife, Kathy.  Picked up Scott.  His flight was 4 hours late!

July 19, Fri
Went to chemo.  Everything went well!  Three- quarters done with my treatment!  Felt a little tired because of my late airport pickup last night.

*******

For your listening pleasure (and mine), I added some christian music videos that I like under the tab, Songs, above.  Sometimes music says it all!

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Halfway Through!

I am officially halfway through my summer of chemo!  Yea!  Six weeks down, six weeks to go!  Tomorrow I have my third chemo session.

I was a little apprehensive when I first started chemotherapy. The unknown is a little unnerving at times, but now that I've gone through two sessions, I can say it hasn't been too bad.  Others going through chemo may have totally different experiences.

I take medicine at home prior to chemo for nausea, and then again through the IV at the infusion center immediately before the chemo drugs are given.  The actual IV treatment doesn't make me feel sick. Afterward I feel good for about 3 days and then I have about 2 days of feeling uncomfortable and a little tired.  From that point on, I continue to feel better until I'm pretty much back to normal for the next two weeks until my next chemo. -- I thank God for being merciful to me!  And I thank all of you who have prayed for me. Your prayers are being answered!

As I've gone through my "cancer saga" with various doctor and other medical appointments,  I've had to fill out info about my health many times. -- You know the forms, a list of 50 sickness or diseases that they want to know if you've had.  It always made me laugh a little when the doctor or nurse would say that I was in relatively good health.  I'm thinking, "Oh yeah, if it wasn't for this pesky cancer thing!"

Anyway, I think that is a contributing factor to why chemo hasn't caused many problems for me.  The more health issues an individual has, the harder chemo can be.  (At least that is what the leader of the breast cancer support group said.)

And laughter does a body good!

Proverbs 17:22  

A cheerful heart is good medicine,

but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

The other day, Josh wanted me to take him somewhere.  In days gone by I would have responded with something like, "Ok, let me put on my shoes and grab my purse and I'll be ready."   Last week when he asked, I said, "Let me grab my breast and put on my wig and I'll be ready."   And then I laughed at what I'd just said. Oh life is funny sometimes, isn't it?

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Gone! - wk 5

"Do these earrings make my head look bald?"

July 7 - 13
I refer to this week and next week as "my good weeks!"  My bad week (and its really not all week, is the week right after my chemo.).

July 8, Monday
Had to get some errands/paperwork/bills done.

July 9, Tuesday
Went to check on a wig store, "Wigs R You."  Still very hot in Rocklin!

July 10, Wednesday
Yes today is the day.  My last few locks of hair will be taken off. Might as well get it over with.  Not much left!

July 11, Thursday
Had doctor's appointment with my GP to followup on blood pressure meds.  Afterward I went to Sutter lab to have my blood drawn so I could have the results when I see the oncologist tomorrow.  Matt picked up Scott tonight.  He was able to get a direct flight, so that shortened his trip a few hours.

July 12, Friday
Saw the oncologist today.  Things seem to be going well.  I'm feeling good. I felt better after this round of chemo than the first time.  I didn't have those tingly achy pains in my arms and legs this time. My "bad" days weren't as bad.  I was up and about much more. I think all those neupogen shots I got right after chemo may not have been totally necessary (in my opinion). The blood test after my week of shots showed my white blood cell count as too high.  So I suppose the shots did their job a little too well! By the next week's test (yesterday), things were back in the normal range.  I probably don't need those shots after my next chemo.

Overall, I feel KNOW without a doubt that God has been with me! He has helped me.  He has been my calm in a storm.  Sometimes you don't know how you would react in a situation.  I had never thought of how I would react or respond with a cancer diagnosis, with surgery to remove a breast or during chemo, but what I have found is a strength that I can only attribute to the grace of God.  He has given me something that, I didn't know was in me!  Where did it come from?  I'm not so holy or spiritual. (My friends and family could attest to that!)  I think it was my upbringing.  I think it was my foundation, the things I was taught as a child:  We trust God.  God is good.  God takes care of us -- even in the midst of storms.  Maybe especially in the storms!

If you would like to follow me on this journey, subscribe to My Breast Cancer Journey by Email. You will be notified by e-mail when I make a new post. Thanks, Pam

It will grow back!

It was yet another one of our warm summer nights in Rocklin.  I had taken a walk after dark in our neighborhood and when I returned home thought I would go for a swim.  Now when I say swim, I really mean float around in a tube and push off the sides of the pool and gaze up at the sky.  Last night the sky was filled with wonderful fluffy patches of white clouds - the kind of clouds a child would look at and pick out various shapes of animals or a pirate ship or a crown or a skull and crossbones, and watch them change shape into nothing recognizable as pieces fall off.  As I looked up searching the sky for the next cloud shaped object, alone, in the dark, in my backyard, I was enjoying the moment.  I began singing songs in my mind and then on my lips quietly, and then talking to God.  I was thinking and looking at the clouds and feeling God close by.  And I prayed that He would speak to me, at that moment looking up, floating in my pool.  I wanted him to miraculously appear in the clouds or maybe be one of the cloud shapes. But no, that didn't happen!

But as I lay back floating around on my yellow and white tube, I marveled at God's handiwork - the clouds and the sky and the stars. The night was still, but a slight wind started to gently blow the tops of our redwood trees.  A few minutes later, a shooting star shot across the sky. . .  And that's when I realized that God was speaking to me! The God of this universe was there beside me and listening to my secret thoughts and prayers.

The Bible says if we seek God we will find Him.  I found Him last night!

Yesterday, I had my remaining hair shaved off, so now I am bald!  I know a few bald men.  I don't know any bald women except those undergoing chemo.  It needed to be done.  It was thin and stringy and almost entirely gone already under my hat on top.  I don't like being bald.  It's not my preferred hair style, but it will be easier to put on my wig and wear my scarves.  At least it is temporary, right?  It will grow back, unlike other body parts!

A special thank you to my friend, Lori, for the shave!

                                                                                                                                                                   

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Lots a shots! - wk 4

This week I had to get a neupogen shot on days 3 through 7.  This is something that is suppose to help with my white blood cell count.  I won't know if it helped until I get the results of my blood test.  I do think I felt better after this round of chemo than my first round.

June 30, Sunday
This is my 3rd day after chemo and I didn't feel too bad until after I got my shot.  Five days this week I have to go get a neupogen injection.  Today was my first day.  I felt OK in a couple of hours.

July 1, Monday
I received my second neupogen shot today.  Just felt bad!  The nurse at the clinic is concerned about my blood pressure.  There could be other health complications if it stays too high.  She wants me to see my GP to have my blood pressure meds adjusted.  I came home and sleep a while after the shot.  Maybe it's the heat.  It's like 108* out.

July 2, Tuesday
I had my third neupogen shot today at 1:30.  I made sure I drank water and ate something and took tylenol right before I went.   Actually felt better today.  Saw Dr. Turnure at 4:50 to adjust blood pressure meds.

I haven't felt the tingling in my legs and arms this time.  I don't know if its because I've been taking vitimin B6 or the neupogen shots.  I'm not sure if the shots have anything to do with it, but that's something that is different this time.

July 3, Wednesday
Well, I'm starting to feel better today.  The shot didn't bother me.  I'm taking different blood pressure meds. God is good!  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!  I think that's my new favorite verse!

July 4, Thursday
Happy Birthday America!
Yes, even on holidays, I have to get my shot!  I do feel much better.  I think the two worst days after chemo were day 4 and 5.  We were to have friends over today, but they were sick.  We grilled hamburgers and Italian sausage and had our own celebration.  The temps have been 106* - 108* all week.  Something unusual happened this morning for Rocklin CA.  It sprinkled for a few minutes!  Doesn't usually happen here at this time of the year.

My hair is still hanging on . . . barely!

My poor arm!

July 5, Friday
Yeah!  No shot today! . . . but I did have to get my blood drawn!  If its not one thing, it's another!  I think I am back to feeling normal.

July 6, Saturday
Well, it's been a long week!  Out almost everyday for a shot or blood draw or doctor's appointment. At least my 2nd chemo is done and my bad days are over! Scott has been home all week on vacation and has gone with me to most of my appointments.  Thanks for your support!

July 7, Sunday
Scott had to fly out today.  Matt took him to the airport at 8am.

Josh and Zach with their mama!

Another week gone!

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Hair today, gone tomorrow. . . . Video!

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